‘And since we have been made right in God’s sight by the blood of Christ, he will certainly save us from God’s condemnation. For since our friendship with God was restored by the death of his Son while we were still his enemies, we will certainly be saved through the life of his Son. So now we can rejoice in our wonderful new relationship with God because our Lord Jesus Christ has made us friends of God.’ Romans 5:9-11 (NLT)
What does true, healthy confidence actually mean? And what is the most helpful way of looking at it? Regardless of how you view it, we all need a bit of positive self–belief to help us take the many small risks in life such as making a new friend, turning up to the first day of school or work, asking someone out for a date, applying for jobs, and the list goes on as we grow up. It’s a natural thing for humans to place a value on ourselves however this can get out of balance because it can so often be compromised by our own unique beliefs, past experiences and capacity to achieve certain standards and environmental expectations.
From a psychological perspective, healthy confidence or self-esteem is more accurately depicted as the extent to which we learn to accept ourselves over time for who we are regardless of our faults and imperfections, and in doing so, recognizing our own worth and value.
Self-acceptance accompanied by compassion towards our shortcomings is the key to developing a healthy sense of self that allows us to show up, engage in life and interact with the world in the most secure and resilient way. When we base our self-esteem on internal rather than external sources, we no longer need to strive towards gaining ‘things’ and meeting (and maintaining) standards of appearance, performance, reputation, career success, etc in order to feel confident. It cultivates an inner peace because we don’t have to look to things and people to qualify and validate us, and frees us to pursue the things that matter in life.
from Journey to Confidence